mary’s blog

(where mary is always write)

Why I Hate Poetry

I hate poetry because I think to write it, you need at least two drinks. And when you read it and try to blink you’ll lose your trail of thought and that stinks!

I’d rather use math for calculating trains and bullets and balls colliding versus counting syllables, hoping they match iambic penta-something.

I never did get why people write a thousand lines to describe a fight:

Achilles, the hero, ducketh right and saveth the maiden from her plight.

Okay. That was lame. But also true. This Homer guy didn’t have a clue. Too bad, he had nothing else to do but write stuff to torture me and you.

And Shakespeare, my dear, I am not a fan of the way you twist your words around. You may have fooled almost everyone but you didn’t fool this famous man.

So what poem, exactly, works for me? Why, one that’s written by yours truly! (But the best-est kind of poetry is one you’ve just read but didn’t see.)


There are 2 reactions to this story, leave yours below?

  1. Maxine on August 20, 2012

    Hihi! I noticed that this was supposed to be a poem from the get-go. Did you have two drinks when you wrote this, Mary?

    • Mary on August 20, 2012

      My lying-lyerson days are over. If I say I didn’t drink, maniniwala ka pa ba? 😛

      (Thanks to you, I found a bug in the comments form. Haha)

Warning: Undefined variable $commenter in /home/marymaca/public_html/blog/wp-content/themes/manlymary/functions.php on line 296

Warning: Trying to access array offset on value of type null in /home/marymaca/public_html/blog/wp-content/themes/manlymary/functions.php on line 296

Warning: Undefined variable $commenter in /home/marymaca/public_html/blog/wp-content/themes/manlymary/functions.php on line 301

Warning: Trying to access array offset on value of type null in /home/marymaca/public_html/blog/wp-content/themes/manlymary/functions.php on line 301

Leave a Reply

All fields marked with * are required. Don’t worry. Your email address will not be published or entered into internet lotteries.

Get mary’s tall tales right in your RSS feed. Share this epic tale of lies on twitter! Read in the dark. Ack! This cursed pinkness! Manlify this blog!